Firstly 31st December marks my 11 month alcohol free milestone.
I was busy on New Year's Eve so forgot to do a post about it (I'm sure thousands of readers were waiting with anticipation lol. I thought I would do a look back on 2023 at the same time.
I didn't go alcohol-free as a New Year Resolution as I don't tend to make them. I think that when you want to make changes in your life you should do them straight away and not put it off until Monday of the start of the month or whatever other excuse you give yourself to procrastinate making the change. I decided on the 28th of January which was a Thursday as I had just woke up and felt like something had clicked. I would have done it the day before but I had a glass of wine with lunch with a friend. I had a night out planned already on the Saturday and it would have been easy to use that as an excuse not to start until after then, but there is always going to be a reason to out it off so I just took the plunge so I could test myself straight away in a social night out situation. I purposely didn't mention it to anybody on the night out and instead drank 0% gin and tonics so they were in the big gin glass and looked the part. Nobody noticed so couldn't say "oh you were dead boring". From then on it wasn't really something I had to 'battle' as such it was more getting used to being able to drive everywhere and not have to worry about taxis. some little habits took a bit of getting used to like having a drink getting ready to go out etc.
I have to say that the positives far outweigh the negatives and I know this is me for the long haul now. I have been able to go out for lots of nice meals as I have had the money to do so and it doesn't matter if it's mid week as I don't need to worry about being rough for work the next day etc. No beer fear, no low moods, I love it.
I've started to make time to prepare things that are good for my body like Tumeric and Ginger shots to help keep the bugs at bay and I feel much better for it. The blog post about those is HERE
I also have Pure Joy functional mushroom powders in my morning coffee (use code NEIL10 if you want to try them with 10% discount) although they are sold out at the moment. Their web link is HERE
I read a chapter (minimum) each morning with my coffee with my Lumi Lightbox on to help start my day in a good mood and try to be more present in the things I do
Here are some of the foods I have enjoyed in 2023...
I have done so many things in 2023 as I signed up to Buckt which is a mystery subscription where you get sent 5 activity tickets each month that you can take any time in the next 3 months as long as you book them that month. I've done everything from axe throwing to salsa classes to archery. It suits me as I have a very limited attention span so doing something once is usually enough for me. I can cross it off as done and move on to the next new thing lol. If you like trying new things and want to give it a go, you can get your first month for £15 (for two people) which is a steal cos even if you only did one activity out of the 5, for £7.50 each you ve had your money back. Just use discount code TVTBUCKT to apply your discount. After the first month you are free to cancel (or at any time) but then it goes to £20 per person or you can do 3 activities for £25 (for two people) the choice is yours.
I've been on a few holidays this year to Iceland, Crete, Benidorm and Egypt and I am going to try and go on more in 2024 and see more places as well as do more new activities. I want to aim to do something new or visit somewhere new at least once a month. There are so many things I want to do and I want to make the most of my time as I will be 52 this year and so you just don't know how many good years you have left.
I also decided in June that I needed to improve my health and fitness as I noticed I had put on a lot of weight since giving up alcohol. I think I was replacing the sugar in alcohol with sugary foods and eating more junk food. I did okay for a bit then felt like I plateaued and needed some support. So in December, I signed up to Family Fit which is a couple Liam and Leigh who have been PT's for a long time and I knew they will get me to the next stage in my fitness. I know December is a crazy month to start but again I just do things when the mood takes me as you can always find an excuse not to make changes. I went on holiday in December and have had Christmas and New Year to contend with and I have still lost weight! I would have been happy to have just put a couple of pounds on but I am chuffed with that. So if you are going into the New Year wanting to get fit, give them a follow on the red link above and have a chat about signing up. Liam set me up with a program I could do at home as I explained I did not want to join yet another gym until I get into the routine of exercising regularly and know I will stick at it. So they can put together a program to suit your lifestyle.
Autumn and winter have in the past been my worst time of the year and for years I have just come home when and shut he blinds when it starts to go dark and not venture out. I've always struggled with a low mood and had S.A.D but this year I have made a conscious effort to get out in the fresh air wind or rain and go out on nights that I would normally have cancelled. And do you know what? It's made a hell of a difference to my mental health. I have felt better, and actually enjoyed this years Autumn and the winter so far. It's all about perspective and the wy you view things, even the words you use. Instead of saying its' grey and miserable I now think of it as an opportunity to wrap up warm in a hat and gloves and feel the wind on my face to let me know I am alive. Instead of seeing dark early nights as depressing, I see them as an opportunity to put my candles on and get all cosy. All these years I have been wasting half of my life every year doing nothing and feeling down when I could have been cramming in more living and activities.
I feel like I appreciate the things around me more now I have changed my mindset. I have soon some lovely views and I love capturing them in pics. Here are just a few...
Something else I noticed in 2023 was the people that you never hear from once you stop being the one to always make the effort. Some friends say things like "Oh well you are always busy", well no I'm not actually, I just only tend to post the interesting bits. Most nights I am sat in on my own but I have just started trying to do more stuff when th opportunites come up and say yes to more things. Plus how would you know I am busy if you haven't even tried to ring, I only post what I've done after the event so that's a poor excuse for lack of effort on their part. I am certainly going into 2024 with my eyes wide open and I am not going to be the one to always put in the effort when it's not reciprocated. I would rather invest my time in the friends who invest back. That's not a dig at anyone as I know everybody has their own lives and gets busy, but a simple text or phone call every now and then costs nothing. As you get older you realise that it's important to make time for people as you never know how long we have all got.
Here are the people that filled my 2023! Some feature more often than others but that's because they made more effort to do stuff with me.
One thing that hasn't changed is my shocking grammar and limited attention span lol.
A friend sent me this Anthony Hopkins quote which I think sums up where I am at right now:-
"Let go of people who are not ready to love you. This is the hardest thing you'll ever have to do in your life and it will also be the most important thing. Stop having difficult conversations with people who don't want to change. Stop showing up for people who are not interested in your presence. I know your instinct is to do everything possible to gain the appreciation of those around you, but it's an impulse that steals your time, energy, mental and physical health. When you start fighting for a life with joy, interest and commitment, not everyone will be ready to follow you to that place. It doesn't mean you have to change who you are, it means you have to let go of people who aren't ready to be with you. If you are excluded, insulted, forgotten or ignored by the people you give your time to, you are not doing yourself a favor by continuing to offer them your energy and your life. Truth is you ain't for everybody and everybody ain't for you. This is what makes it so special when you find people you have friendship with or mutual love. You will know how precious it is because you have experienced what is not. There are billions of people on this planet and many of them you will find at your level of interest and commitment. Maybe if you stop showing up, they won't look for you. Maybe if you stop trying, the relationship ends. Maybe if you stop texting, your phone will stay dark for weeks. That doesn't mean you ruined the relationship, it means the only thing sustaining it was the energy you only gave to keep it. That's not love, that's attachment. It's giving a chance to those who don't deserve it! You deserve so much more. The most valuable thing you have in your life is your time and energy, as both are limited. The people and things you give your time and energy to, will define your existence. When you realize this you start to understand why you are so anxious when you spend time with people, activities or spaces that don't suit you and shouldn't be near you. You will start to realize that the most important thing you can do for yourself and everyone around you is to protect your energy more fiercely than anything else. Make your life a safe haven, where only people "compatible" with you are allowed. You are not responsible for saving anyone. You are not responsible for convincing them to do better. It's not your job to exist for people and give them your life! You deserve real friendships, true commitments and a complete love with healthy and prosperous people. Decision to distance yourself from toxic people, will give you the love, esteem, happiness and protection you deserve.
So here's to an eventful 2024 full of trying new things, visiting new places and enjoying what opportunities come my way! Who knows what the universe has in store. ;-)